Couples or partners in relationships seek out counseling for a variety of issues but one of the main reasons they come in for therapy is due to one partner’s extramarital affair. The disclosure of an affair places extreme stress on a relationship, and it is not uncommon for either partner to experience anxiety, depression and a deep sense of loss. The partner involved in the affair may feel guilt or shame, while the other partner often feels anger, betrayal and emotional abandonment.
Couple therapy in this case can often result in a more intense bond between partners, as members of the couple learn to communicate their needs more clearly and discover areas where the relationship may need to be strengthened. For instance, there may be a lack of emotional intimacy between partners and therapy will be aimed at having the couple work to rediscover feelings of closeness and trust. All of the emotions and resulting behaviors a couple is experiencing can be addressed in marriage or couple therapy, which provides a safe haven for passionate expression, clarity and resolution.
I work using a combination of ideas informed by two types of therapy: emotionally focused therapy (EFT) and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). EFT allows a couple to understand and track their frustrating behavior cycles, and helps them recognize how childhood wounds continue to play a role in their current relationship. CBT further enhances closeness in partners as they practice behavioral changes to relearn to take care of each other's needs, through improved communication and deeper understanding. Counseling is a great resource in aiding couples in focusing on goals, growth and positive change within their relationship.


